You’re a Yankees fan headed to Los Angeles for the primary time. In fact you may have questions.
In spite of everything, you’ve come west from an outdated, dense, smelly, shrinking, corruption-plagued metropolis whereas we wait right here in a younger, sprawling metropolis that’s — nicely, OK, additionally smelly, shrinking and suffering from corruption.
However we’ve got In-N-Out. And on these winter days whenever you’re prone to freezing like an ice sculpture on the sidewalk, we’re standing round in yoga pants and board shorts, pretending we’ve simply been browsing.
You’re rooting for a fledgling workforce (based 1901) whose house is a newfangled ballpark (opened 2009). We cheer for a extra venerable establishment (Brooklyn Trolley Dodgers’ first season: 1884) and cavort in a classic 1962 stadium.
You gave the world George Steinbrenner, Billy Joel and the Bronx Cheer. We gave the world Vin Scully, Randy Newman and the Excessive 5.
You may need tastier pizza and bagels — though not less than one meals critic from New York thinks the very best bagels are in Berkeley. We have now tastier every little thing else, together with Dodger Canines.
Anyway, you’re right here now. Upon arrival, put together for the wonderful ease of LAX, the homespun great thing about Century Boulevard, the high-speed comfort of the 405. Subsequent you might surprise: Will there be sufficient parking at Griffith Observatory? Is it a simple stroll from North Hollywood to West Hollywood? Is the ocean clear beneath the Santa Monica pier?
Sure, sure, sure, in fact. And for a great icebreaker in any chat with a Dodgers fan, simply say one thing good about Manny Machado.
Simply kidding. We wouldn’t lead you astray. Right here’s some higher recommendation for getting round city.
You is likely to be afraid of driving right here. We’re too. However wait till you see our subway. Now, which do you worry extra?
Possibly you want some extra landmarks that will help you get oriented.
That brick constructing at 757 S. New Hampshire Ave. in Koreatown? The “Seinfeld” condominium constructing.
That coffeehouse on the Warner Bros. studio lot in Burbank? The Central Perk inside from “Friends.”
The gritty crime scenes in all these “Law & Order” episodes? — oh, these are again in New York.
However in case you’re wistful for giant metropolis glitz and grit, the sights, sounds and smells of Hollywood Boulevard await. Should you’re lacking the glossy, silvery traces of the Chrysler Constructing, have a stroll round Disney Corridor. Should you miss the skaters in Rockefeller Middle, take a look at those on boards on the Venice Skatepark.
Need to begin an argument? Ask the place the road is between the east aspect and west aspect.
Ultimately, in fact, you’ll go to the ballpark, a midcentury marvel surrounded by palm bushes, fetching greenery and bittersweet reminiscences of Fernando Valenzuela. Should you see an unpermitted vendor, don’t try to purchase pretzels. They may hand you an Ohtani T-shirt and demand $700.
I have to confess, we’re nervous about what Aaron Choose may do to our bullpen. In spite of everything, final time he was right here, he broke the door.
And talking of bullpens, as soon as the sport begins, don’t blink otherwise you’ll uncover one other new Dodger on the mound. Of their peculiar type of invincibility, the Dodgers undergo extra pitchers than McSorley’s Outdated Ale Home on a Saturday night time.
You recognize to be nervous about Shohei Otani’s bat. Simply don’t overlook Chaz Perea’s inexperienced thumb (he’s the panorama supervisor behind all that greenery) or Dieter Ruehle’s organ. Along with his fast wit and keyboard prowess, Ruehle has performed the Dodgers, Lakers and Kings to 6 championships. However don’t fear. You continue to have Billy Joel.
Lastly, in case you’re questioning what’s truly in a Dodger Canine, there’s a neighborhood saying which covers that: Overlook about it.